The Eternal Challenge
President Bush said today that he would nominate Paul D. Wolfowitz, the deputy secretary of defense and one of the chief architects of the invasion of Iraq two years ago, to become president of the World Bank. After appointing John R. Bolton as the new American ambassador to the United Nations, stand by for the appointment of Scott Peterson to oversee Laura Bush's new outeach to young males program. -- March 17, 2005
Haul Ass
As the Pope swings in and out of hospital like Robert Downey Jr. does rehab clinics, we are forced to consider what life would be like without this old, doddering, hypocritical, satin-bedecked tranny puppet in its Popemobile, jewels and ridiculous headgear (that rivals Queen Elizabeth's), causing its head to bob up and down like a bobblehead doll. Frankly, for many he will be missed as much as Jeffrey Dahmer, but as with Jeff, many kids will be a lot better off without his hate and prejudice. Haul ass, and good riddance -- don't keep us hanging on for too long. -- February 26, 2005
Diplomatic Immunity
Following in the footsteps of Prince Harry's unfortunate choice of costume, Vice President Dick Cheney thought that a drab, olive-green parka and a ski cap would be the perfect outfit to represent the United States at a memorial ceremony at Auschwitz. Defenders commented that the cold weather was a justification, as if a Speedo clad Australian Prime Minister John Howard would be acceptable at a September 11th memorial. -- Janaury 29, 2005
A Midwinter Night's Scream
Let the news consumer decide, and let major news organizations like The New York Times package and sell their standards, ethics and credibility because it's all they have to distinguish them from tabloids, bloggers and lesser news organizations. As columnists condemn bloggers on TV and radio shows hosted by "news personalities" peppered with experts, pundits and analysts, discerning what journalism is, is almost as tough as defining what is is. Trust is earned by delivering on a promise, not simply making one. -- January 14, 2005
 
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