The first pathetic waste of government resources, taxpayer money and the public trust came with Alabama's dildo ban; a pseudo-religious state displaying false modesty, requiring Bibles in classrooms, shunning orgasms in the bedroom. The second, Roy Moore's refusal to remove a statue he commisioned and personally installed on public property. We offer advice and solutions to please all concerned.

Chief Justice Roy Moore was suspended from the bench for defying a federal court order to remove a 5,280-pound Ten Commandments monument he had installed in the Alabama Supreme Court building. While civil disobedience is fabulous when you're a civilian, it's not okay when you're spending tax dollars as a public official trying to convince us that we came from Adam and Eve, but that incest is wrong. Go fuck your own siblings Roy.-- August 26, 2003

Does anyone recall his last good movie? Does anyone recall his last good Act? Does anyone recall Enron? Does anyone recall Collateral Damage? Schwarzenegger said he'd be back, and he meant it. Davis said he wouldn't go away and he meant it. Bad Actors. Bad Acts. The worst script California wrote will be the most expensive movie it ever made. -- August 8, 2003

"I did not have anything to do with those 16 words, not one time, never," declared the POTUS the SCROTUS (Spineless Cowardly Rectum of the United States). So while Condoleezza Rice claws George Tenet's eyes out in an effort to protect Dick Cheney, we'll all pretend that the war for excuses over the excuses for the war revolves around the sixteen word lie, and not the Administration itself from the very outset.